How To Be Good In Bed. 3 Tips To Do Today!

Sex is an important part of life. And it should be enjoyable for everyone involved! Often times we’re made to feel like this topic is taboo, or we cannot talk about it because it makes people uncomfortable. But how are you supposed to know what to do unless we can have an open discussion about what works and what doesn’t?! Often times men are left in the dark about what women want and what works for us. We teach men that they have to do so much work and it’s all about lasting for hours, and this couldn’t be further from the truth! Great sex is actually way less work and so much more fun! In this article, we’re going to discuss the myths and lies that you’ve probably encountered and just what it means to actually master the bedroom. (I’ll give you a hint, it does not require 4 hours of stamina. That actually sounds painful for women.)

How to be amazing in bed. 3 tips!

Tip #1 Slow down!

This is not a race to the finish line! Often times we are taught that we need to get to the results, the orgasm. But the truth is that if you are so focused on the results and trying to get your partner to orgasm, or just trying to get yourself to orgasm, it’s not going to be as enjoyable. Especially for your partner! Slow down! Pace yourself. Allow your partner to enjoy each moment and let her tell you what feels good for her. If you take away the moment, you take away the enjoyment. Stay in the moment.

Tip #2 Find her hot spot.

Guys, this is the thing that will set you apart for her. Everyone has their own “zones” on their body that are extra sensitive to the touch. Everyone is different so it’s up to you to explore this and find the hot spots on your partner. Also, find your own hot spots and let your partner do the same for you! Most common areas are on the neck, in between the thighs, in the crook of the elbow, and on the sides of the rib cage. And there can be multiple! Have fun with your partner exploring this and see for yourself what happens.

Tip #3 Connection connection connection!

This is so important, guys. The #1 thing women complain about is lacking a connection with their partner. Often times we are so concerned with what to do, what to say, how to say it, what to wear or which position that we lose sight of the one thing that is the most important, just connecting to your partner and being in the moment with her! Look into her eyes. Connect. Breathe at the same time as her. To get you back into the moment and slow yourself down, pay attention to her body and her eyes. Watch what they are doing. When you touch a certain spot on her, what does her face do? Does her back arch? THAT is how you connect with your partner in the bedroom. Pay attention instead of trying to think of what to do next.

If you want to really understand how to Master The Bedroom get our product here straight from a woman’s mouth! 

How to be the best in bed. The truth about what women really want.

A lot of men think that it is the rush to the bedroom and after you’ve taken off your clothes that sex starts. This is false! Sex for a woman starts before the date even happens. It happens while a woman is getting ready and putting on her makeup and shaving her legs in preparation for the night. Why? Because women are more into mental stimulation and in order for a woman to be fully turned on, it starts in her mind. This is mental foreplay. When a woman is thinking about sex and imagining being with you, the brain sends signals through her body and rushes blood downwards.

While you are on the date, make inuendos and insinuate sex without ever saying it. Play with your words and form them in a way that hints at sex but could also just be a regular sentence. The difference will be being playful and looking into her eyes and smiling when you say it. Think about sex in your mind. Only do this a few times. Play with her. When you play with a woman’s head, you wind up capturing her imagination and now she’s thinking about sex with you. Now she is turned on.

This is extremely important because a woman does not light up and get turned on as quickly as a man can. Think of it as a classic engine that needs to be warmed up. Mental foreplay warms up the engine and allows for the car to run smoothly and have you both enjoying the ride. Do not skip this step guys, it’s the most important.

How to be better in bed and help with performance anxiety.

Thinking about the magical moment between you and your partner can cause some anxiety, even extreme anxiety. A lot of that also has to do with thinking about the future. Feelings of worry and trying to map out everything that you will think, say or do can have us losing track of time and have us forgetting what’s even important; having fun!

Here’s the thing to focus on guys: if she’s saying yes to the date, she’s already attracted to you! If you guys have been going out for a little while now, she’s interested! She will also be initiating and dropping hints that she’s wanting to deepen the relationship and move things to the bedroom, so you won’t need to play guessing games here. The main thing is going to be to breathe. Pull yourself back into the present moment (get out of the future!) and remind yourself “I am enough. She’s already here with me. She already likes me. I’m going to enjoy this moment with her!” Do some affirmations in your head. And before the date, check out some guided meditations.

Keep this golden rule in mind: when I’m anxious, I’m in the future, when I’m depressed, I’m in the past, when I’m happy, I’m in the moment.

How to be better in bed for guys. What women don’t tell you.

A lot of women won’t tell you that they like to be stimulated first in their minds, that they want sex just as much as you do, that they have already been thinking about you in the bedroom and that they actually DON’T care if you have a six-pack. Now, try and keep yourself well put together, but most women don’t care about what you look like, we are not visual like men are, we care about how you make us feel. It will literally alter our brains and the way we view you based on how you make us feel and how emotionally stable you are with yourself, how confident you are with yourself. If you are able to laugh at yourself and not take yourself so seriously and also enjoy life and love yourself.

This is all just scratching the surface, guys! When it comes to being the best in bed, it also depends on what kind of woman you are out on the date with and what you’re wanting. Are you wanting a relationship? Is she wanting a relationship? Does she just want a one night stand? Make sure you are clear with your intentions and you know what her intentions are, too. If what you are looking for does not match up and align, someone is going to get hurt. So make sure you are clear with your intentions about what you want and it is the same as hers (remember we cannot change anyone. If they do not align with what we are looking for, then they aren’t the ones for us.)

For more information and to dive deeper into this, we just launched a product called Master the Bedroom. In this, you can uncover women’s perspective on sex, how they really feel, and how to master the foreplay, intercourse, aftercare and so much more. There is also a section in there to help with performance anxiety, a panel of women getting open and honest and sharing the truth about what women want, and we even cover positions and more tips and tricks! You deserve to enjoy this experience with your partner!

Let me know what helped you the most in today’s article! I would love to hear from you in the comments below.

If you want to really understand how to Master The Bedroom get our product here straight from a woman’s mouth! 

Your coach,

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  1. I laughed out loud when I read your assertion that “women want sex just as much as men do”. Please! You know that’s not true, otherwise women wouldn’t reject men in the bedroom, and wouldn’t employ one on their favorite sh*t tests on men; namely the “withholding sex test”, something that men never do. Whoever heard of a man withholding sex from a woman? It never happens because men want and need sex much more than women ever will.
    There is not a man on this planet, living or dead, who has not felt the sting of sexual rejection by a woman at some point in their life. The same cannot be said for girls. They can get sex whenever they want, whereas men aren’t that lucky. So unfair!
    And while the mental stimulation can be fun and arousing, it’s not a necessity for men the way it is for women. And because of these “requirements” it proves my point that women have the weaker sex drive.
    I know that you won’t print this, much less respond to it, because it contradicts all the feminist propaganda that the media puts out there; but believe me when I tell you that many a man reading that line about equal sex drives had the same amused reaction of disbelief that I felt.
    So please do men a favor and don’t try to raise our hopes about women having the same level of se ual desire as us. We men have all been disappointed enough by the ladies when it comes to that.

    1. Oh Paul, had you taken the time to Latvian my hear the advice given you might have realized that it’s having an attitude such as yours that is preciously the cause of women you encounter not having the same sex drive. For starters not listening to them, and making assumptions is a major turn off for women. What was pointed out in this article was that you need to stimulate a woman mentally and connect with her in order to turn her on. It has nothing to do with physical attributes. If you follow the advice you’d be creating sexual tension, and making her desire you insatiably. Play a little hard to get, don’t be so over eager to get her in the bedroom. Don’t focus your interactions entirely on sex, don’t even discuss the topic unless she brings it up. You may hint at it, use witty sexual innuendos, playfully flirt and show your desire with eye contact and a sly smirk, but only briefly. And trust me on this one, coming from a guy who has withheld sex (it’s very possible) nothing lights a ignites sexual desire in a woman more than withholding sex from her. Do all the foreplay you want, but if you withhold intercourse from her, she’ll be the one pining after you desperate to get you back in the bedroom purely because as you stated the majority of men have never turned down the opportunity, most are pushing so hard for it that it’s a turn off in itself. Women don’t know how to handle rejection when it comes to sex because it’s not something they ever really encounter. It also shows that you’re not like every other man, you’re confident and not desperate. Don’t be cold about it, make it playful, be a tease, tell her she has to wait before you’ll give that to her, as if she needs to earn it from you if she wants it. And trust me the look alone on her face will be priceless. She’ll be ripping your clothes off and so incredibly turned on that youl’ll have the time of your life, mind blowing sex, her enthusiasm for it will be off the charts. Also your focus should be on pleasing her, and not yourself, but don’t make her feel pressured to have an orgasm, you need to show her that you desire her, that you care about her needs, but most importantly let her know that it’s ok if she’s unable to orgasm too, you’re not going take it personally. The article was not bashing men in the slightest, it was very honest and factual. It wasn’t a personal attack so there’s no need to get defensive. Don’t knock it until you try it basically. Obviously what you’ve been doing isn’t working, perhaps it’s time to learn a new method?

    2. You’d also be doing yourself and her a favor by researching the female anatomy, and discovering their erogenous zones, the variety of orgasms they’re capable of having, don’t assume that you know how to please every woman, as no two are alike. Learning to communicate will get her to help guide you in learning her body and the. My friend, her sex drive may even exceed yours.

  2. Since you deleted my heartfelt and honest comments that I wrote you yesterday, I no longer wish to receive any emails, promotions etc.from your company. It’s quite apparent that you don’t tolerate any views other than your own, male bashing beliefs. Too bad!.

    1. Hi Paul,

      We welcome all opinions at all times and love to give a platform for men and women to express themselves freely as long as there is no profanity or discrimination towards our readers. If your message had none of that, We can assure you it is still here for everyone to read 🙂
      Have an amazing blessed day and thank you for taking the time to read our blog and comment.
      Apollonia’s team

  3. Of course to be good in bed, a guy has to be attractive enough for a woman to go to bed with him in the first place. Since I am not – and cannot be – this is pure theory.

    1. Hi Richard! Thank you for reading “How To Be Good In Bed. 3 Tips To Do Today!” Being attractive is cool but its about having confidence and feeling the other person 🙂

  4. Yes – but a woman still has to want to go to bed with him in the first place. She has to see him – and be attracted to him – as a sexual being. I have many good friends who are women, but none of them have ever expressed any indication that they see me as a sexual being. I’m very confident but it’s literally *always* clear that all women want with me is friendship. And before you ask, no I do not express sexual interest in women I find attractive. Doing so would be creepy.

    1. HI Richard, thank you for reading “How To Be Good In Bed. 3 Tips To Do Today!”. Chemistry and attraction are the first things necessary for getting more intimate 🙂 Best of luck and take care!

  5. yeah paul
    Every person say s that woman is more attractive than man but this is false every person have same capacity or limit also in sex woman and man are both same attraction nor more nor less i hope u people understand

    1. Hi Hasnain! Thank you for reading “How To Be Good In Bed. 3 Tips To Do Today!” and for your support! Physical looks are not the most important part of the attraction.

  6. Thank you for responding. I totally agree that chemistry and attraction are the first things necessary for getting more intimate. Unfortunately, those things are completely absent – there is literally *never* chemistry between me and any woman – even though many of them are close friends. Maybe I should just accept that no woman can be / will be attracted to me in a sexual way? I will not express sexual interest until a woman gives me a clear sign that she wants me to do so.

    1. Hi Richard! Thank you for reading “How To Be Good In Bed. 3 Tips To Do Today!” and for your support! I recommend checking out our youtube channel. Apollonia offers a lot of free advice on her blog/Instagram/Facebook/YouTube channel. 



      If you’re interested in some individualized guidance, here’s the link to book a private session as Apollonia would need more details and to make time in her schedule; 
      The link will provide information on the different styles and rates for coaching sessions with a step by step breakdown of what to expect.

      Best of luck and take care!
      Katy – Apollonia’s Assistant

  7. When talking about becoming a sexually confident man, people often ask questions like: “What were some of the things that worked well (or didn’t work) in your past intimate relationships?” and, “What partners were the most memorable, and why?” These questions – and the vast majority of sources on the topic – assume that the person has / has had a sexual partner. I do not and never have, so my question is how can I become sexually confident when, at 43, I have never had sex or been on a date? For a man to have sex with a woman / get a date, he needs to attract a woman in the first place. Most people take this as for granted, but for people like me, it’s a showstopper because we can’t. I’m not physically ugly and have lots of female friends – some of whom I’m attracted to sexually – but there has (literally) never been a hint of sexual interest shown in me.

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