In today’s day and age, it’s hard to gauge whether or not a girl is really into you. Sometimes a girl is just nice or friendly or has a naturally flirtatious personality and it’s difficult to tell if she’s actually interested or not. Other times, a girl with an outgoing personality will start to avoid flirtatious behavior because it was too often misinterpreted. Even if she’s interested, she might not be obvious about it… It all seems so complicated sometimes, but is there really a way to know if she likes you or not if she doesn’t say it outright?

If you’ve been wondering about how to know if a girl is interested, you’ve come to the right place!

In this article, I am going to explore the obvious signs and the very subtle signs that a woman is interested in being more than just friends with you. Some of the things that you’re going to learn in this article might actually even surprise you! As an added bonus, I’m going to add a section on what to do if you want to make her fall for you… So without further ado, let’s get started!

How to tell if a girl is interested: Why is it so hard sometimes?!

A lot of women run into the problem of having their outgoing personality being misinterpreted as an invitation or as flirtatious behavior when in reality they just like being friendly. The result is that many of them feel like they shouldn’t be so open, and subsequently become a little bit more closed off. This makes it hard for you to figure out if she likes you or not.

Perhaps the issue is a bit different for you. Maybe you know someone and she’s caught your eye. She has that magnetic personality and that million-dollar smile, and you feel your heartbeat a little bit faster each time you see her. She’s funny and whenever she smiles at you you get that fluttering feeling in your stomach… Thing is, she’s got that open, inviting personality with everyone. She’s just the kind of person that everyone loves to be around.

So how can you tell if she’s smiling at you because she likes you or because she’s nice? How can you tell if she puts her hand on your arm when you make her laugh because she’s into you or because she’s just affectionate with her friends?

And more importantly – how can you tell if you’ve been friend-zoned?!

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The other things that complicate matters are that people are all so different. Everyone has their own way of communicating their feelings and everyone is going to have their own little characteristics that differentiate them from everyone else. It’s going to be up to you to pay attention to these things.

If you already know her pretty well, this is going to be easier for you, but if this is someone that you don’t know that well yet you’re going to have to pay attention and observe how she acts around you compared to how she acts around other people. Just be careful to not watch her every move and make her feel like you’re surveying her…!

It’s also important to be realistic and not convince yourself that she likes you if in fact, she doesn’t like you that way… I know that sounds harsh, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t change the way she feels about you! You just need to be aware of what she’s truly feeling so that you know how to plan accordingly.

If she’s into you, (unless she’s someone who loves to play games…) there will be conscious signs that she’ll send you that indicate sexual or romantic interest, but also subconscious ones. So let’s look at how to know if a girl is interested in you.

How to know if a girl is interested: 10 telltale signs

I know you’re hoping to find some positive signs she’s flirting with you and you don’t want to be lead on. You don’t want the girl you like to allow you to think she likes you too because she’s too nice to flat out reject you. You’d rather know for sure because then you could choose whether you want to give up and move on, or change your plan of action and get her to fall for you!

In the following two sections, you’ll find clear signs that she’s into you, but also signs that are a little less obvious that should be taken into consideration as well.

One of the main things to keep in mind is that most of these signs are going to be non-verbal. If she told you, “I have feelings for you,” or “I’d like to be with you,” you already have your answer! But chances are that if you’re reading this article that hasn’t happened (yet!) so let’s take a look at what you should be on the lookout for.

If you recognize a multiple of the following indicators of interest, chances are that she’s definitely into you!

Obvious signs a girl is interested

Makes sure you know that she’s single: Perhaps she’s gone out of her way to let you know that she’s available. Has she told you that she isn’t dating anyone or asked whether or not you have someone special in your life? She could be dropping hints that she likes you … This is especially true if talking about how single she is doesn’t really fall in line with the topic of conversation. Chances are she just wants to make sure she has a chance to let you know that she’s available.

Loves spending time with you: One of the biggest telltale signs that she’s into you is if she really enjoys spending time with you and reaches out to you on a regular basis. If she wasn’t into you, she wouldn’t go out of her way to see you.

First to reach out: Similarly, if she has feelings for you, she will be the one to initiate a conversation or hanging out.

Always in touch: When a woman has feelings for you, she’s not going to disappear off of the face of the earth!

Touches you a lot: When you want to know: how to tell if a girl is interested in you, look at how tactile or reserved she is when you’re talking to each other. If you’re close enough to hug when you see each other, is she enthusiastic about the hug, does she let it linger, or does she give you a quick little pat on the back before promptly pulling away? Does she touch your arm or your knee during a conversation? If she’s tactile with you it could mean that she’s into you!

Teases/flirts/compliments you: When a girl is into you, she’ll be playful with you and/or compliment you. This way she can gauge where you stand as well, so don’t take it too personally if she’s teasing you!

Her friends hint at it: If you’re friends with her friends and they start dropping hints like telling you she’s single, or that you two were so cute at that party the other night, they might be doing it so that you realize she’s into you.

How to tell if she’s interested: Subtle signs

Asking personal questions: If she asks you a lot of questions about your life and the things you like to do, it means that she’s interested in who you are as a person. If she didn’t like you she wouldn’t really care, so she wouldn’t go out of her way to find out more about you or carry on the conversation.

Eye contact: A person who isn’t into you is going to avoid looking you directly in the eye. They will try to avoid your gaze as much as possible. That said, some people are bashful and her feelings for you might make her nervous – which is another reason why she would avoid eye contact. Pay attention to see if you see other indicators that she likes you as well and you’ll have a better idea of what she’s feeling for you!

Mimics you: We subconsciously mimic the people that we are interested in. Pay attention to whether she touches her hair a few moments after you do, or if she does the same things with her arms that you are while you’re talking. You know the saying: imitation is the most sincere form of flattery!

Licking or touching her lips: She might be consciously or subconsciously trying to bring your attention to her lips. If you’re not sure whether she’s trying to be seductive or if it’s a nervous tick, just pay attention to whether or not she does it around other people as well.

Body language: Keep an eye out for “open postures.” Think uncrossed arms, sitting facing you, eye contact, leaning in… If her body language is telling you that she’s open to continuing the conversation with you, she might be interested!

Not sure if she is interested? Here is what you need to do

If after reading these indicators your gut is telling you that she might not be interested, don’t worry. There are all kinds of things that you can do to make her change her mind and fall for you. If you’d like one on one guidance every step of the way, don’t hesitate to reach out to me directly here!

If you still aren’t sure, here are some signs that she might not be that into you:

She avoids you: If you’re always trying to make plans with her and she always manages to say no or wiggle out of them, she may not really want to spend time with you.

She talks about other guys to you: If she’s talking about how attractive this guy at her job is or how she’s really into the guy she’s started seeing, it could be her way of letting you know that she’s into someone else.

She doesn’t make an effort to get to know you better: If she never asks you about yourself or if she doesn’t seem to be interested in the things you share about yourself, it could mean that she’s not interested.

She never touches you: This will depend from person to person, but if she’s a generally affectionate person and never touches you (or quickly gets out of hugs), it could mean that she doesn’t like you like that

You are just being the nice guy towards her.

That said, the single most important thing that you can do in order to be attractive to other people is to be happy and satisfied in your own life. If you’re feeling happy and confident, you’ll attract people like moths to a flame!

If you try to convince her to like you by being needy, clingy, or omnipresent, it’s going to be an instant turn off. She’s not going to want to be with someone who’s desperate to be around her. She’s going to want someone who is loving life; someone who inspires her to be a part of it.

There are so many things that you can do to become more attractive in her eyes, and if you want to read a more in-depth article on the subject all you have to do is click here.

I sincerely wish you all the best!

All my best,

Your coach for knowing how to tell if a girl is interested,

Apollonia Ponti

Sign up for a coaching session with Apollonia or her team here!